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Oh Crap Holiday Knitting (& YAY BOGO PATTERN SALE)

"Did you want to set that meeting up before Thanksgiving?" the forever responsible Mr. Dk asked.

I felt my eyes narrow into slits over my raised sake glass, the one with the pink geisha sitting with her kitty cat. I should have known he was up to something when he used my favorite wine glass to hold my favorite dry box wine.

It was the Monday evening before Thanksgiving and this man wants to schedule for a realtor to walk through cluttered tiny home, with the pet hair and toddler art clinging to the walls.

"Do you mind?" he asks, not realizing how close he is to pushing me over the edge.

Bless this efficient man who has no idea how long chores take until he's knee deep in dusty Christmas decorations in the attic, trying to shove as much baby stuff as possible out of the critical eye of our realtor.

Yes we are moving. Yes I am scared. I gave birth to Joy in this house. Bought Beau home in his infant car seat in this house. I spent years bitching about the 70 years of wallpaper that is layered ALL OVER this house, with each layer marking pivotal moments in the house's life like a tree ring (PSA: for heaven's sake take down the old wallpaper before installing the next one ;___; )

Nearly every picture that I have taken for the Drunk Knitter has been in this little cruddy farmhouse that is inconveniently placed in the middle of no where. It's the type of house that forces disappointed family members to say "Well, it's a house."

Here's the thing. It's not just a house. It's our home.

"Hmm, I guess we should try to straighten up first huh?" he suggests thoughtfully.

Because of the great move, I will not be doing much, if any holiday knitting. So I'm going to be living vicariously through all of you. So here I listed some of my favorite last minute Christmas gifts. If you're savvy with a knitting machine, many of these can be adapted quite easily for even quicker gift giving!

But really, to make these, all you need is stash yarn, your 2 hands, and a box of wine.

AND, as promised, all of my patterns are BOGO FREE here on my website (that is buy one, get one free) from now until 11/28, use code HOLIDAY at checkout!

The True Crime & Knit hat is sized to fit all humans and features a a textured double brim. This warm hat will literally fly off the needles.

With the option for a convertible or traditional mitten, A Cinch uses modern techniques for faster mitten knitting.

Jacob's pullover was the work of a madwoman. I knitted these 3 sweaters back to back last holiday season. Knit in aran weight yarn, these FLEW off the needles. Jacob's pullover is sized to fit all humans.

No matter what you choose, every one of my patterns are BOGO FREE here on my website (that is buy one, get one free) from now until 11/28, use code HOLIDAY at checkout!

Now you can knit all of the last minute gifts. I, of course, will be knitting in spirit while I chug wine and pack moving boxes.



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